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10 Erotic (And KINKY) Things We’ve Done To Spice Up Sex Life

Think monogamy is synonymous with boring vanilla sex? Think again.

Sometimes when I think about the enormity of having sex with the same man for the rest of my life, it can get a little overwhelming. Gone is the thrill of one-night stands, intense and steamy hookups, and all those fun firsts that made sex so exciting in the first place.

Nope. Instead, I have sex with the man who has held my leg in the air as I pushed his child out of my vagina. The man I share a mortgage with. The man who buys me medicine when I have diarrhea, and the man who knows what I smell like after four days of camping without a shower.

But we remain undaunted, on an eternal quest to keep our physical lives just as thrilling as they were back in the days of frat parties and keggers. So how do two middle-aged parents in the suburbs keep the bedroom steamy? They get creative.

Here are kinky ways to spice up your sex life. Trust us, it will be insanely erotic.

1. We had sex in public.

We snuck out after dark with sleeping bags and blankets and attempted to do the deed in the middle of his elementary soccer field. The illicit thrill of being seen, the fresh air brushing across our naked bodies, the brand new bike path that had just been built three feet away from where we were getting it on.

Thankfully, the biker that passed just we were getting started laughed and encouraged us to “Have fun, guys!” I’m pretty sure my husband’s boner went away faster than the guy’s bike.

2. My husband tied me up.

I love being tied up, always have. The problem is I’m also a bit of a brat and insist on breaking out of every tie-up my husband has ever tried to put me in. “YOU’RE A DAMN EAGLE SCOUT! TRY HARDER!” I yell. In retaliation, he went out and bought Velcro cuffs for my ankles and wrists that go under our mattress. Well played, boyscout. Well played.

3. My husband spanked the sh*t out of me.

I can remember the first time he tried to spank me, it was this sort of serious tap on my butt that left me wondering if maybe I had a spider on it? Here’s the thing about spanking: the spankee has to be in the mood, the spanker has to know his or her own strength and you have to have a safe word.

Years after our first serious spanking, I crave it just as much as any other sexual act — something about the adrenaline from physical pain coupled with the complete trust I have in him to not actually hurt me. In other words, don’t let some stranger off the street spank you. That’s unsafe. And it’s probably illegal. The sexiest part of spanking is the trust you have to have in someone in order for it to be done right.

4. We had (gasp!) butt sex.

To quote a very good friend: “My butt is a special occasion, like, Happy Anniversary, honey! Here’s my butthole!” Anal has this huge stigma around it, and I get it because I subscribed to it for over two decades. Butt sex isn’t meant as a daily indulgence because honestly sometimes you’re just not in the mood to have your butthole touched at all.

But at the same time, it’s a very unique and intense feeling I rather enjoy. Just know that there is no other act where lube is more important. Until you feel like you’re using too much, you’re probably not using enough. (You’re welcome.) Butt sex is fun. So there, stigma — kiss my butt, I kind of like it.

5. We had a threesome.

This one is NOT for amateurs. In fact, if you want to ruin your unstable relationship really fast, have a threesome. However, if done properly, with the right person and negotiated down to the absolute last detail as to who can touch what, when and where, a threesome can be amazing.

Trust me, all the awkward conversations about expectations and details beforehand will make the whole experience way more pleasurable. Take communication seriously, don’t be shy, and get specific — you’re about to see each other naked. Oh, and let everyone in advance which holes are off-limits.

6. We watched graphic porn together.

You have to have a really honest relationship to watch porn with someone because chances are what you’re going to like will be completely different than what your partner will like. The first time my husband decided to show me his favorite clip, a giant “HOLY SH*T” expression plastered itself to my face.

Suddenly, I was convinced my husband wanted to saddle me like a pony and ride me around an abandoned mansion. But rather than saying “Ohmygod, this is so weird,” I asked him what he liked about it, knowing we were both seeing different things. If you want to try new things in your relationship, you’re going to have to be equally open-minded and vulnerable.

7. We read smutty books together.

50 Shades of Grey was just the first book to get attention. Smut has been written for YEARS and there are so many books a bazillion times better than the saga of Christian and Ana. In fact, reading smutty books made me realize that I wanted to try butt sex.

While I enjoy the narrative surrounding the sexual encounters, my husband just wants to know what I want him to do to me. So while I read the whole story, I’ll give him the kinky highlights to peruse as I rub my body up against him like a horny little creature in heat. And get this, guys: There’s even smut that makes the use of condoms downright sexy foreplay; now that’s erotic literature.

8. I gave my husband a grapefruit blowjob.

Who knows how I ended up on the article, but it was about a grapefruit blowjob, and you know what? I had a grapefruit and a can-do attitude that night. I would have never walked up to one of my high school boyfriends and said, “Spread ’em honey, I’m about to put citrus on your penis and you’re going to like it.”

However, when I told my husband to close his eyes and trust me, he knew he could. And you know what he got? A pretty damn good blow ob and story to tell his drinking buddies.

9. I let my husband dominate me.

I’ve done a lot of research into the nuances and history of dominant/submissive (or D/S) relationships over the last few years. It’s nothing new — doms and subs have been around for centuries and there are varying degrees found in every socioeconomic culture across the country (and probably the world).

The key to any D/S relationship is trust — and I trust my husband more than anything else in the world. One night I simply asked him if he would come after me and not stop what he was doing no matter what I said or did (unless it was our safe word, of course). And you know what? It was one of the hottest nights of my life. And even better, it was with the man I’ve been monogamous with for half my life.

The next day my body was so deliciously sore from fighting against him. When you can be completely consumed and overtaken to the point of bumps and bruises, but then curl into each other when it’s over and know you are safe, loved, and respected, there’s nothing better.

10. We mutually masturbated.

Following the aforementioned confessions, mutual masturbation may seem boring. But in a world where many religions preach masturbation as a sin, I say death by vibrator! How can you truly know what you like if you’ve never figured it out for yourself?

We went the first ten years of our sex relationship only touching each other, not ourselves (at least not in front of each other) and the first time I slid my hand down there and let him watch me make myself feel good it’s as though a whole new level of pleasure unlocked. Several weeks later, I saw him put his hand on himself as his mouth was on me and I immediately came.

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11 Things No One Tells You About Watching Porn

1. Finding it is so intimidating. Seriously, at no point in time are you exposed to what the best source for beginner’s porn is. And everybody knows what happens when you google “porn?” That is the last internet hole you want to fall into.

1b. Your computer will not explode with pop-ups and creepy, unseeable things. I avoided searching until I felt like a Real Woman who could handle having an impressive Internet history and not illogically panic about my laptop dying forever because I looked for porn that one time.

2. There are SO MANY different kinds. Not everybody knows what they’re into, but there is a place in the porn world for everyone and her mother. (Literally. Sorry, ew.)

3. There are a lot of close-ups. Which might be the point, for some people. But for a first-time watcher, the intimacy of it all might be overwhelming. When you settle in for P-in-V or P-in-B or P-in-anything porn, you are signing up for an anatomy lesson too.

4. You are inevitably going to compare yourself to the porn stars. How do they get such perfect bikini lines?!

5. Your butthole doesn’t look like porn star buttholes. Unless, you know, you’re into this kind of thing:

6. It’s amazingly body-positive. You can find porn that shows any body shape or size or color. It’s super sexy and real and wonderful.

7. The yelping. Porn is not a rom-com. There will not be whispering and growling and sweet nothings. There will be “OH YEAHs,” “FUCK MEs,” and yelping. Screaming, too. Which can be hot if it doesn’t take you by complete surprise, I think.

8. There’s a sequence to the sex, generally. (Little-to-no foreplay)-BJ-oral-missionary-doggy-style-some kind of cowgirl. This is something to be aware of if you’re really not into blow jobs. You can fast-forward!

9. They make deep-throating look easy. It is not easy. You may get inspired and want to try this at home. Practice first! Maybe take a class. There’s no way anyone finds that easy to do.

10. You’re probably not going to get off from it at first. Yes, you can laugh. Porn is funny. But it’s so weird to watch other people having sex for the first time that your vagina might get a little confused.

11. But you’re probably going to get a little turned on. Even if you are more intrigued, confused, or amused than anything else, a liiiiittle part of you will be into it. Go with it! You can consider your butthole-bleaching options another time.

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7 Ways to Improve Your Married Sex Life

Several years ago, my wife and I were out to dinner with a group of other couples. I don’t know exactly how but the subject of discussion turned to sex. Apparently, this was a group of couples who were not inhibited about sharing because one of the wives said matter of factly, “I must be a boring girl. I’m only interested in doing the one standard position.” As much as I appreciated her vulnerability in sharing something so personal, at the same time I wondered how the conversation got to this point. Before I could even respond, one of the other husband’s (not hers I might add) said, “Well you’re missing out.”

Whether he was right I can’t say, nor do I think their sex life is any of my business. However, I do think every married couple would like to have a passionate, fun, and fulfilling sexual relationship. If you are someone wondering how to improve your sex life in marriage, there are some small habits that can help. I can’t promise that all of these practices will do the trick, but they will definitely move you closer. Here are 7 ways to improve your married sex life.

1. Talk a Lot

Great sex starts with communication and connection. In order to have both you need to do a lot of talking and listening. Be honest and vulnerable about how you feel about your sexual relationship. Don’t sit bitterly in quiet dissatisfaction. Tell her your turn-ons and turn-offs. Ask her what she likes and what she is missing. Your sex life will only be as good as your honesty and vulnerability with each other. Finally, talk during sex. Verbal communication while having sex is just as important as the physical.

2. Send Signals Throughout The Day

In other words, flirt with her. Give her signals that you desire her consistently during the day. Think of it like getting foreplay started early. Before leaving for work wrap your arms around her and kiss her on her neck. Let her know she’s desirable. Give her a once over and tell her how lucky you are to have her. Send her text messages to let her know how sexy she is. Call her in the afternoon and let her know you’ve been thinking about her, and perhaps what you’ve been thinking about her. Even if it makes her laugh that’s a good thing. It means you’re connecting. If you want to have great sex at night you need to start making your moves when you wake up.

3. Touch Her Regularly

This is similar to the last point. Touching her early and often warms her up. I try to touch my wife in some way every time I’m in her vicinity. When she’s at the kitchen sink I’ll give her a ten-second neck massage. If I need her attention I’ll touch her hand. When opening a door for her I’ll put my hand on the small of her back as passes through. These little touches are physical connection points that build trust and encourage vulnerability. It opens the door to a deeper level of physical affection and perhaps the willingness to explore more types. This brings me to my next point.

4. Change Things Up

Many couples get into a rut because they are bored of doing the same thing. For some, it can be like playing the same song over and over again. You’ll never get out of a rut doing the same things. Have a discussion about trying something new. This comes back to the first point. You have to be willing to be honest with one another about what you’d like to try.

5. Work Out Together

Being healthy and in shape will make both of you feel better physically and make you feel more attractive. On top of that, it will lift your spirits. When you are both in a more positive mindset it’s a lot easier to feel passion. A body in motion tends to stay in motion. Get the blood moving by working out together and see what develops from there.

6. Schedule It

We all want to be spontaneous, but in a world of family schedules and kids it’s not unromantic to get it on the calendar. Sex can be like working out. When we do it consistently we want to do it more. When we don’t carve time out and commit, it can be easier to just watch TV or worse. And that brings me to my final point.

7. Stop Watching Porn

There are some who argue that watching porn together can help a couple’s sexual relationship. I couldn’t disagree more. In most cases, it creates distrust at best when trust and connection are the most important ingredients to great sex. How can you connect when you are looking at a screen rather than focusing on each other? Stop looking at porn and start looking at your wife.

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5 Ways to Watch Porn and Defy the System

While the government promised you acche din’ not even a single MP promised you acchi raatein. So, here comes another ban – your favourite porn website is now blocked in a country that wrote the definitive sex manual.

Please observe a minute of silence for the fact that legislators can watch porn at work but you can’t, even in a locked room!

A twitter debate over the weekend suggested the end of porn watching in India. On most internet service providers (ISPs) – including Vodafone, MTNL, ACT, Hathway and BSNL – porn sites were inaccessible.

So, if you were searching for popular porn sites like Pornhub or Redtube, you ended up on blank pages. This might happen for a few more months as reports suggest that more that 800 porn websites will be blocked in the country.

I hope these guys know that there are over a million porn websites and they can’t block them all even if they wanted to, which they clearly do.

And no one can make you stop watching porn (if you’re into that kind of stuff)! So here are 5 ways you can still access porn sites, even if they are blocked.

1. Get on a VPN (Virtual Private Network)

A VPN or Virtual Private Network helps you encrypt traffic between your device and the VPN server. This will keep you safe and also give you access to your favourite porn website. You can get a VPN easily on your Android or iOS smartphone. Get a VPN for your computer here.

2. Change Your DNS Server

A DNS server is like an index with a list of domain names. When you type in a website address in your browser, your device sends a request to the DNS server and then an ISP can choose to redirect the request to a different site or a blank page as in the case of porn. A simple DNS server change could open up your connection. There are many free, fully open third-party DNS services on the internet. The most popular ones are run by Google and OpenDNS. All you need to do is change your DNS server settings to theirs and enjoy the acchi raat.

3. Proxy Servers

Remember how in school computer labs, Orkut was blocked and you could just go to a proxy service and access the social network?

This is exactly the same. You get a lot of proxies on the world wide web that allow you to use their Internet connection, thus bypassing most of the restrictions set up by the ISPs or the network administrators. A quick Google search for ‘anonymous browsing proxy’ will give you a long list of services available on the web.

4. Go Dark

If the normal web stops you from making yourself happy, just go dark. Download a Tor browser and go anonymous. This will get you on the Tor network. This lets you enter the world of the Deep Web, or as many restrictors like to call it Dark Web. Everything is accessible to a user on Tor, including porn. This one is the easiest way to go anonymous and get access. Dowload the Tor browser here.

5. Use Cached Pages

Another easy way to get things rolling is to use cached search. This might give you limited access to your favourite porn website. This mirrored content is refreshed quite often, so you won’t be left with outdated content. The only downside in using this technique is that you may not be able to use interactive content, such as streaming media. Even a Google search can get you a cached link to your favourite porn site.

Go ahead and enjoy. Just remember to lock the room.

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10 Hot Reasons To Use Sex Toys With Your Partner In Bed

I have been a fan of sex toys ever since I bought my very first vibrator at Condomworld in Boston. My college boyfriend and I were “on a break,” and I thought the best way to deal with the emptiness was to buy a vibrator and a fancy shmancy lunch for myself. When I got home later that day, I opened the package, tossed in some batteries, and had my mind blown. There was no going back after that.

But back then, my awesome vibrator wasn’t something I discussed. Sadly, my masturbation habits, too, I kept to myself. So although I had this great toy that I loved (it was baby blue!) and from which I had some pretty intense orgasms, it was my secret for a long time. And the thought of using it with my partner, once our “break” was over, was completely out of the question. I’m so happy I don’t feel that way anymore.

One of the big reasons my sex life with my current partner is so good is because we use sex toys. Neither one of us shies away from introducing new ones to our sexual activities, and we both agree that variation in sex toys also enhances our sexual experiences with each other. These days, I can’t imagine having sex without them in our toolbox.

If you have yet to use a sex toy with your partner, then it’s time to shake things up. Here are 10 great reasons why you should be working them into your sex life.

1. They Take The Pressure Off Of You

Sometimes it’s hard to orgasm — no matter how giving your partner is. According to the Kinsey Institute, 70 percent of women need some sort of clitoral stimulation in order to achieve orgasm. While stimulation of the clit can be achieved with fingers or the tongue, depending on your position, those might not be options. In reaching for that extra help from a vibrator, you’re taking the pressure to orgasm off of yourself, which can help open all kinds of doors to orgasming with your partner in general.

2. They Take The Pressure Off Your Partner

No matter how long you’ve been with your partner, they’re never really going to be able to hit that spot the way you can when you’re masturbating. In bringing a sex toy or two (or more) to the bedroom, you will not only take the pressure off of your trying to achieve orgasm, but it will take the pressure off your partner, too. Sex will be relaxing and tingly, like it’s supposed to be, for both of you.

3. You’re More Likely To Have Multiple Orgasms

Once you take the pressure off yourself and off your partner, then you can open the door to not just orgasms that are easier to reach, but even multiple orgasms. It’s actually a scientific fact that vibrators enhance sexual satisfaction, so between toys and your partner, you’re setting yourself up for an intense situation that will be full of more orgasms than you’d probably get if it was just you and your partner sans the battery-operated toys. It keeps going and going and going…

4. Exploration Makes For Hotter Sex

Exploring new realms in your sexual relationship doesn’t just open up doors to things you never knew you could possibly enjoy, but creates an even greater sexual bond. Let’s be honest: You never forget the first person who handcuffed you to the bedpost.

There are remote control toys that your partner can control from across the room (or across the globe); butt plugs for those looking to try out anal play; dildos, which are great while a woman is receiving oral sex; and whips, blindfolds, handcuffs, gag ball, and nipple clamps for those looking to take their BDSM game up a few notches.

5. They Encourage You To Try New Positions

With all this exploration going on, you never know exactly what sort of twisted up positions in which you’ll find yourself. The Kama Sutra may have only 64 positions, but with enough creativity and a sex toy as your guide, you might find there are more than that.

6. Mutual Masturbation Is Awesome

We already know that masturbation is really good for you, but it’s also really hot to watch each other masturbate. And, it’s really educational, too.

Masturbating with sex toys in front of your partner not only shows them what you like and how you get yourself off, but it’s great foreplay. Men, especially, are very visual creatures, so for them to be allowed behind the curtain to watch you masturbate basically makes them feel like they’ve hit the jackpot. And if you’re into someone, then you’ll probably be equally into watching them pleasure themselves.

7. They Can Help Bring Fantasies To Life

If you’ve always wanted to play the authoritative school teacher, there’s a whip for that. Or maybe you’ve been fantasizing about playing a police officer and handcuffing your partner to the bed ― whatever the case may be, dressing up, role playing, and using toys as your props is the best way to take the fantasies out of your head and into the real world.

8. You’ll Be Giving The Middle Finger To Any Stigma

Although sex toy use is more common than ever, they still sometimes get a bad rap for being only for “lonely” women, and even some men are intimidated by the idea of “competing” with sex toys. Seriously, guys? By using toys in the bedroom you and your partner will be giving the finger to those outdated myths — which only makes sex even more fun.

9. You’ll Finally Put Your Curiosity To Bed

So, you’ve been happily enjoying your sex toy solo, but you’ve been wondering just how much enjoyment it would be if you introduced it to your partner. Well, what are you waiting for then? Once you give it a try, you can stop wondering, and start having the best sex of your life.

10. Buying Them Together Is A Bonding Experience

In purchasing sex toys together, you can decide which ones are going to be a good fit for the both of you. There’s a huge variety of toys out there, and with a little trial and error, you’ll find one that works for the two of you. Also, don’t be afraid to talk to the salespeople — they can lead you in the right direction.

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What are the benefits of watching porn?

There are thousands of websites are out there where you can find thousands of different porn such as Anal, gay, Big boobs, crazy shit, TwistedPorn and many more, etc. If you want to give relaxation to your body, then porn would be an ideal option for you. However, sex is the natural fact that can be found in couples. As per researchers, if you are doing sex once a month then, you can improve the health and can get rid of hassles. With the help of Dale’s sex blog, one can grab lot things such as porn videos and details about sex toys.

Moreover, most of the people are watching porn for masturbation. However, if you are watching porn on a regular basis then you can satisfy your sexual needs. One can access porn website anywhere and anytime. With this article, we have listed the potential advantages of watching porn.

  1. Increase the libido

According to professionals, if you are watching porn on a regular basis then it will lead to the addiction. With the help of porn, one can satisfy their sexual needs. Adult movies are really effective in terms of mental health and other things.

  1. Stress reliever

If you want to relive from stress, then you should watch the porn. Like, if you are looking to the nude pictures, then it will reduce the stress. When your body gets a lot of stress, then it generates the particular hormone that is known as cortisol. Therefore, if you want to improve the problem-solving abilities, then you should watch porn once a week.

  1. Sexual positions

If you are watching a different type of porn, then one will able to know about sexual positions. Therefore, if you don’t want to stick in a particular position then must obtain new sexual positions. After that, one can give enough relaxation to the body.

  1. Porn promotes the masturbation

As per recent research, masturbation is really healthy for us because it increases the fertility. It is one of the best things that will give relaxation in the muscle tension and menstrual cramps.

  1. Porn is safe

Porn is utterly different from the physical sex because it doesn’t spread any kind of harmful disease. Well, porn is really safe, reliable and convenient. Porn is a useful tool that is providing a lot of benefits to the adults.

  1. It is entertaining

There are plenty of entertainment things available, and porn is one of them. If you are in a relationship, then porn is an ideal option for you because it will increase the sexual interest and stamina. Therefore, if you want enjoyment in the life, then porn can be a reliable option for you.

  1. Healthy

Well, if you are watching porn on a regular basis then you can improve the health. Most of the researchers have found a positive relation between porn and sexual satisfaction.

Moving further, with the help of Dale’s sex blog,one can grab a lot of information about sex and porn videos.